This year is different.
The tree is the same one we’ve had for years. The ornaments just get better and better as I add a new photo of the kids and something that represents my travel each year.
But there is this one thing that has changed.
I don’t know that I was as prepared as I should have been for the gut punch I felt when having a conversation with my small dude as we were decorating the tree.
“Why are moms and dads encouraged to lie to their children?”, my Cooper asked the other day. He stared at me, eyes every-so-slightly shimmering wet. I took a deep breath before I responded.
“Buddy…. I know it is hard to understand, but I haven’t been lying to you. I believe. For me, Christmas has always been about belief. It has always been about hope and joy and giving and love. That IS what Santa represents. He is bigger than you and me and his magic teaches us. I realize he looks a bit different to you now. But the message and the gift of Christmas are the same.”
Now that he is surrounded by all things Christmas and holidays, it is sinking in and he doesn’t love it.
He will no longer wake in the middle of the night, certain he heard reindeer hooves on our roof.
He will no longer look, with amazement, at the leftover crumbs of cookies and half-drank milk, mind blown at the notion of Santa getting in and out without waking us all.
I will no longer catch him whispering his wishes and worries to Freddie, our elf.
With each day we move deeper in to December, ever closer to Christmas Day, I can see new realizations dawning. Yet, the flicker of hope is still there.
I’m grateful for that flicker because I do believe. And I want him to feel the same.
While I’ve known for years that Santa doesn’t make his way down my chimney, I fully embrace the magic of giving, belief and hope that he represents.
I love that he was one of the first to teach me to believe in something bigger than myself. I’m hopeful the lessons and love that come from him (as well as from me) are helping to teach Cooper and Delaney the very same thing.
I’ve always believed one of my primary responsibilities as a parent is to raise good citizens of the world – giving children who grown in to giving teens and then to giving adults. And those same adults believe – in love, in themselves, in their family and friends, and the basic goodness of people.
I’m hopeful this first year of disbelief can be transformed in to our first year of DEEP belief….in magic, in love, in the gift of togetherness and in each other.
Happy Holidays, my friends.
Oh yeah. I remember the year I had to have the “Santa Talk” with all three of my kid. At first, they couldn’t understand why I would tell them something that “wasn’t true”, but then I explained that it was all about the magic of the season and all the great memories we had, and they got it.
That brings back memories for me, of having the Santa talk. I was saddened that our kids would say, so-and-so says Santa isn’t real. I understood kids would talk, but, that was OUR job to tell them. We told our kids the magic of Christmas is within us, and encouraged them to just celebrate the gifts and be around our loving family.
This is a beautiful article. I never had children so I can’t imagine how hard that moment is when Santa is no longer a magical, mysterious fellow. You did the right thing. Santa is more of a spiritual belief that represents all the love, care and giving of ourselves to others.
You’ve decorated your tree so incredibly well! I love how you add on every year – with things that will tell the ultimate story: travels, family, etc. What a great way to showcase your year!
Ahhh I don’t have kids but I can see how this is tough!! Your home looks absolutely beautiful and so cozy.
I love this post. I don’t have kids so I can’t imagine how this feels but I love that he will now get to truly experience the magic of the season and maybe appreciate you and your husband a little it more for everything y’all do. Sweet boy!!
We haven’t had that talk with our kids yet. They haven’t really brought it up. Your decorations are beautiful.
Wow, you have a very beautiful set up. I am honestly not sure I’m ready for that talk just yet. My kids still believe, but I don’t know for how much longer. They are getting to the age where I know they’re going to start asking questions.
Awww, I am dreading the day when my youngest son figures it out. He is 6 and we have a few more years. The elf didn’t come last year due to laziness on my part so this year he I pulled him out. Our elf has been bouncing around the house and my son loves looking for him each morning.
I haven’t had to have the talk with my son yet. He’s 11, and seems to still believe. I know that this will not last much longer, but I am looking forward to being able to share the secret to him… that we all are a Santa
YES! Coop is 11 too…so hope you have more time with him embracing the magic.
I was devastated when my now 13 year old quit believing. Some jerk kid at school ruined it for him. He goes along so he doesn’t ruin the magic for his 5 year old sister. I’m soaking it up because I don’t know how much longer she will believe.
Ahhh – I HATE when someone else deliberately spoils the magic. So sorry. Hope you will continue to enjoy it with your little one for many more years.
It’s really beautiful! I love everything decor in your home. I absolutely love it.
Thank you so much, Victoria.
Awwww I know how you feel. I went through this with my kids but I wasn’t prepared recently when my granddaughter told me she doesn’t believe in the magic of Christmas (specifically Santa) and I was about in tears to realize that this part of her life is no longer magical. Your home is so festive and beautiful.
Thank you for your kind words, Terri – and I understand – I wanted to cry with my little guy as well.
Oh it is so heartbreaking when the magic of Christmas is over for the kids. I really dont understand why we lie to them, but I guess it is part of the Christmas spirit/
That is definitely a tough thing when your child comes to you about this subject. I love the way you approached it though! I’ll have to keep this in mind if it happens again.
As a personal choice, I never told my daughter that Santa was a real person or anything like that. He was just a fun thing to talk about like Rudolph, Frosty, etc.