School has started back full swing in our home, and I’m not going to lie – It’s blissfully glorious to have a few solid hours of uninterrupted quiet time around here. No one begging for a snack, tattling about all the wrongs done by a wayward sibling, or shooting Nerf darts above my head (or at my head) 452 times a day.
Blissful.
There’s always a small part of me that misses the children when they head back to school. Life is much more hectic when they’re here, yes. But it’s also more fun. And so, for a few brief moments each day, I miss the bustle and the hustle, and even the Nerf darts.
Then I laugh, grab an iced tea and open a good book.
The arguing and bickering are the one thing I do not miss for a single second. Toward the end of summertime, when the beauty of all that togetherness has worn off, it seems that my children cannot walk through the same room without finding some way to tear each other apart. They’re like little chickens pecking one another to death, and I am the mother hen in the corner ready to fly off the handle at any given moment.
There are a few tried and true methods that I’ve found to combat the arguments that leave me feeling weary with annoyance and exasperation…and sometimes curled up in a fetal position in the corner of my closet.
First, separation. Sometimes everyone just needs to return to their corners to regroup. Ten minutes in a bedroom with closed doors does wonders for bickering children…and exasperated mothers. Some days, ten minutes is all it will take. Other days, ten minutes could turn into an hour.
The second method I’ve found to help curb bickering is actually heading it off altogether. We’ve all been there, sitting at the kitchen table with our coffee when a child stumbles out of the room all scowled and grumbly. From that very first curt greeting, you can tell that you’re in for a long day. These are the times when I’ve found it’s best to make them laugh.
My children are still young enough that they find me more funny than annoying. This method will probably have to be tweaked in a few years when teenage attitude incites eye rolls over giggles. Even still, my eleven year old is in that interesting phase between grown up and little kid. He’s the boy-man who has already mastered the art of the eye roll – he just forgets to utilize it.
You want to make a grumbly preteen boy laugh? Walk past him and very quietly whisper “poop,” or any other potty word you can think of. Even the hardest of boy hearts cannot resist a good potty word.
A little well-placed sarcasm (the funny kind, not the mean kind) can go a long way to breaking a mood. As the children sit stewing at the table, turn on the blender and fill the kitchen with the most awful, loud, grinding sound imaginable. And when it goes off, turn to them with wide eyes and ask, “Did you guys hear that?”
Sounds ridiculous, right? Not to an eight year old. She will snicker every. single. time.
A little tickle under the chin, or a silly dance as you walk by the table can do a lot to soften a mood, and a laughing kid is less likely to stick her tongue out at her brother. It’s not fool-proof, but it works more than it doesn’t, and those are odds I can live with.
My husband and I love to laugh, and we work hard to keep laughter central in our family. From silly practical jokes to lip synching KidzBop songs, we are willing to make fools of ourselves if it means we get to hear that delightful sound bubbling over from happy hearts.
And when they become teenagers, we will continue to work hard to keep laughter in the house. If anything, they will be laughing at us then, which is fine, too. I can take it. It beats arguing and eye rolls any day of the week.
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